NFL Teams ECG
You might be wondering… what is this post about? What the heck is an ECG? Very simple… the ECG is one of the most well-known machines in a hospital that nobody knows what the heck it’s called. It’s the machine that shows a person’s heartbeat with lines and beeps. Yeah, you know what I’m talking about. Well, at the half-way point of the NFL season, there are teams that still have a pulse and teams that don’t have a pulse.
The “Alive and Well” Group
Teams in this group have been playing very well and have nothing to worry about… if they keep playing this way.
Indianapolis Colts - The Colts survived a scare against the Texans, in which the Texans had a chance to bring the game into overtime, but were unable to do so on a 42-yard field goal. They still remain kicking at 8-0, and perhaps the best team in the NFL.
New Orleans Saints - 2 consecutive sub-par first halves for Drew Brees… what is going on? Not enough to stop him from bouncing back and keeping the Saints undefeated.
New England Patriots - The Patriots have won 3 in a row and are undefeated at home. Tom Brady has been good. I wouldn’t say great, but definitely good.
Minnesota Vikings - With Adrian Peterson carrying this team, you can never count them out. And now adding the excellent play of Sidney Rice and the solid play of their defense, this team is a difficult team to beat. It doesn’t hurt that Brett Favre makes timely throws that ends up winning games too.
Pittsburgh Steelers - The Steelers have claimed 5 in a row and are also undefeated at home. When it looked like there might be trouble after losing to their division rivals, Cincinnati, the Steelers have bounced back nicely. Their running game has been very good and Ben Roethlisberger has played very well. Their defense has also played well despite injuries to key pieces at different times.
Cincinnati Bengals - The Bengals sit atop the AFC North alongside the Steelers. Their defense and running game is the reason for life this year. If they can keep this up, they will be back in the playoffs.
The “I’ve Got Some Good News and Some Bad News” Group
Teams in this group are alive, but they do have some worries.
Dallas Cowboys - The Cowboys have been playing very well as of late and now sit atop the NFC East. This is very surprising considering how the beginning of their season went. Now if only they can find a way to not choke at the end… Of course, they can’t just sit back since the Philadelphia Eagles and New York Giants are formidable teams.
Arizona Cardinals - The good news? You’re in the NFC West. The bad news? Well, you haven’t been playing very well. You let the Carolina Panthers beat you down. Hopefully, that was just a 1 time thing.
San Diego Chargers - The Chargers have won 3 in a row all thanks to their offense. Their running game is still unimpressive and their defense has been inconsistent. If their defense can pick it up, the Chargers will sit atop the division.
Denver Broncos - The good news? You’re a pretty good team and you’ve got the best record in your division. The bad news? You’ve lost 2 in a row. The Chargers offense has been playing very well. You might have to win some games to win this division.
Philadelphia Eagles - The Eagles, despite their troubles, are only 1 game back in the division. When Westbrook returns, the Eagles offense should receive a nice boost. It doesn’t hurt that their division leader hasn’t exactly proven that they are an elite team.
Green Bay Packers - The Packers have a good shot at a wild card. Their offensive line and defense really needs to play better than it has been in order to do so. There’s some real competition in the NFC this year.
Chicago Bears - Much like the Packers, the Bears need to step it up a notch to make the playoffs. They’ve got a good shot. The Bears were supposed to be elite with the addition of Jay Cutler, but they certainly have not been elite.
Atlanta Falcons - The Falcons are in a position to grab the wild card spot. Their offense has been good, but their defense has not. This team needs their offense to carry their defense if they’re to get in the playoffs for the second year in a row.
The “Your Only Chance Is This Drug That is Still In Its Trial Phase…” Group
If your team is in this group, it’s not a good thing. Sure, they still have a chance… but they also see the light at the end of the tunnel… and they’re going towards the light…
New York Giants - The Giants have lost 4 in a row. It’s obvious that the Giants secondary cannot match up with teams with a good receiving corps. They’ve been able to beat the cupcakes, but they haven’t proven anything yet. What do the Saints, Cardinals, Eagles, and Chargers all have in common? Good passing games. If the Giants can’t develop more of a pass rush or get some pieces to bolster their secondary, the Giants might not make the playoffs.
San Francisco 49ers - The season started off so well and they actually had me believing that they could make the playoffs this year. Shame on me! But wait… the 49ers are only 2 games behind the division leader. If their defense can get some key stops, they might be able to make it…
Baltimore Ravens - This team showed so much promise at the beginning of the season. Their passing game was good and Rutgers product, Ray Rice, has been very impressive. Unfortunately, after the departure of Rex Ryan, this defense has not been the same. When they finally regain their identity, this team will go far. But as of right now, they most likely won’t make the playoffs.
New York Jets - Don’t be so down on the Jets… before the season began, the Jets weren’t expected to do much better than 8-8. After a red hot start, everyone expected the Jets to be an elite team. Don’t forget, their QB is just a rookie. And now you’ve lost Kris Jenkins and Leon Washington for the year. This team is pretty much done, but at least they have a bright future.
Houston Texans - The Texans are a team that’s just too difficult to predict. When their offense is clicking, they can beat almost anyone. When it’s not, they’re a sub-par team. They need to learn to play more consistently… and that’s on the head coach.
The “Are You Sitting Down?” Group
Are you sitting down? I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but… if you’re a fan of any team in this group, your team won’t make it.
Jacksonville Jaguars - Don’t let the standings fool you… even though they’re only 2 games behind for the wild card spot, they won’t make it. Their defense has been downright horrible. Their offense, aside from Maurice Jones-Drew and Mike Sims-Walker, has been terrible as well. Maybe they should sign more players with a hyphen in their name…
Miami Dolphins - The Dolphins running attack has been very good despite the lack of a good passing game. Their defense has been very good as well. But unfortunately, the AFC is stacked and they won’t win their division. There’s always next year!
Carolina Panthers - The Panthers have one of the best running games. Their 2-headed combo of DeAngelo Williams and Jonathan Stewart should be illegal. But this has been evened out by their lack of a passing game and their porous defense.
Seattle Seahawks - What puts the Seahawks in this division when they’re tied in the standings with the 49ers? Lack of potential. What is this due to? Injuries. They could field a team with all their injured players. (And plus, I’m a 49ers fan.)
Tennessee Titans - The Titans are on a winning streak! Too little, too late.
The “Even Dr. House Couldn’t Save You” Group
If your team is in this group, they should send all their players to help scout. Because the only thing they can look forward to is the draft. And the draft the year after as well. That’s how bad they are.
Buffalo Bills - Ah… the best team in this group. They probably should have given more work to Fred Jackson because they played so much better back then. Things are looking so bad that they are considering acquiring Michael Vick to play quarterback. Don’t get me wrong, Vick was an excellent QB. But he’s not the answer… Though it would be interesting to see him paired with Terrell Owens.
Washington Redskins - This season started off poorly when the team publicly shopped around for a QB when they still had Jason Campbell. It started to snowball when Coach Jim Zorn made a few bad decisions. Then they took away his playcalling abilities to try to force him out. And now they lost Clinton Portis to a concussion. Things are so bad, they’re considering signing Larry Johnson. On a more positive note, at least they’re not the Browns or the Raiders, right?
Detroit Lions - The Lions arguably have the best future of any team in this group. Calvin Johnson and Matt Stafford seem to be a good combination together. Brandon Pettigrew had a lot of promise coming out of college. Kevin Smith continues to be a solid running back. And the most important thing of all, Matt Millen isn’t here to screw it all up.
Oakland Raiders - Nnamdi Asomugha is wasting his talent in Oakland when his immense talent can be better used elsewhere. I feel bad for the guy.
Kansas City Chiefs - The Chiefs finally let go of Larry Johnson. Nobody expected them to contend this year, and they certainly didn’t.
St. Louis Rams - The Rams should trade Steven Jackson while they still can and try to get some draft picks. They certainly won’t be going anywhere and Jackson is the lone bright spot on this team.
Tampa Bay Buccaneers - The Bucs stop here. They might not win any more games, but at least they didn’t go without a win. I don’t know what positive things that I can say about this team besides “At least they’re not the Browns or the Raiders.”
Cleveland Browns - From Mangenius to… well, I don’t know what they call him in Cleveland. But it’s certainly nothing positive. After running out his friend from the position of GM, the Browns do not seem like an appealing place to work. They might try to rival the Raiders for Most Dysfunctional Franchise.
